Friday, November 26, 2010

Scary mean asian girl

Hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving! I flew back to Chapel Hill on Tuesday night and am here for an entire week. Seriously, "not really working but still kinda working but still making the same money but being able to live in yoga pants" rocks. Really hard.

So let me talk about something I've mentioned on a previous post. I call it my scary mean asian girl factor. Now once I get to know people I'm fine and normal (I think), but I'm not someone who is overly friendly or warm or welcoming to those I don't know. Some people just go out into the world with this friendly, open vibe. I don't. I've been this way for as long as I can remember.

Back in college one of my best friends started out as a suitemate in our dorm. Before we got to know each other and she got to know my high awesomeness factor, folks kinda referred to me as the scary mean asian girl. I don't know... unlike some of my friends, my friendliness factor is quite low, especially with strangers.

This also makes it damn near impossible for guys to approach me on the street. I've had random guys tell me that I should smile more, a comment which I usually end up returning with a sideways look sorta like this: <.< Or when it does happen, I'm so caught off guard that I respond with this half shocked half defensive look on my face that isn't very warm or welcoming.

I'm torn between just accepting that this is how I am as opposed to trying to change or improve it. I mean I'd like to be a little more open and friendly. But then I wouldn't be able to relate so well to the cute little angry asian girl in the Angry Little Girls comics by Lela Lee.

Too cute, too cute.

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